Ok this is a post I'm trying to burry a little bit. I want to write about it for carthartic reasons. I am leaving for Raliegh and generally in the TV buisness if you are liked by your co-workers you are given a party. I had one in Toledo and a halloween party in West Virginia was inpart a going a way party. So with that said I'm down to my last two days and nothing is planned. Their is a gathering this week for another co-worker. He is leaving the station to move to Cleveland, he has been at The Network since the beginning and everyone loves him.
This got me thinking. "Do people really like me?" I've always had a mental problem with people. I always feel like I'm a bother and that people don't want me around. I never call people any more because I'm afraid to bother them and they might be busy. I just don't know if what I am thinking is true or is it my neurosis gone a muck. I have been very unhappy with work and regretfully I have a tendency to have my emotions on my sleeve.
I know right after I got married a production guy got married and there was a collection for a gift for he and his bride. I truthfully was a little hurt by that, and that started this little thought. "why is that guy getting a station gift. I don't want a gift, but it would have been nice though." I'm hoping I'm just over thinking this, and it's just because another great guy is leaving so I kind of got left on that back burner. I'd rather have that than for people to be happy I am gone.
I hope that if people at work happen to read this that I am not asking for a party now, it's just questioning how I will be remembered. I hope this does not make me sound petty and with a case of Sour Grapes.
1 comment:
Know exactly how you feel. I think people at work like you JB, but I think Raymo's departure is a bit of a shock to most people there because he has been thought of as a "lifer" for at least a few years now. I think people guessed that you'd be moving on to bigger and better things.
I'd just chalk it up to a general lack of consideration on their part. Unfortunately, his leaving just happens to overshadow yours. When I leave, I can guarantee you that there won't be a party thrown in my honor, and that's because while you may THINK that they don't like you, I KNOW that they don't like ME, ha ha....no, seriously.
As for not calling, I can't speak for anyone else, but I will say this: I just don't call married people becuase, well, they're married and I assume they have better things to do. I'd rather hang out with my wife over Dave Z too if I were married. I'd have drinks with you before you left, but unfortunately you're leaving when I'm currently flat broke.
Maybe I can talk one of the girls at the station into giving me a "farewell reach-around" when I get ready to leave. I think it's the least they could do.
-check my blog from time to time, and I'll do the same.
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