Thursday, January 03, 2008

Is it Me?

I don't know why, but I've always have felt like people don't like me. I think it's something from childhood, but it drives me crazy. Why do I obsess over this, I know there are people who like me, but why can't I get this through my head.

Earlier in the week someone at work told me that there will be a group doing karaoke at a local watering hole. I was excited, I haven't been asked to go out that often, plus it was karaoke, I enjoy karaoke, but not for the same reasons as most. I like doing spoken word renditions of popular songs or I act like a total idiot and go all "rock star."

Yesterday started out bad and kept getting worse. In news you get days like this and there is nothing you can do, but bend over and take it. It's cold so we had to do the obligatory it's cold outside story, we drove to Durham and shot half and then finished the rest in downtown Raleigh. Then a spot news story popped up and we had to drop everything and go on a story that happened three hours earlier. We barely get everything done, but the viewer at home did not notice any problems.

While all that was going on I kept getting a feeling that karaoke was not going to happen. I mention the outing to The Serg and he didn't know anything about it, that made me think even more that it was a bad idea to go. I had to make myself want to go, I'm just being paranoid and everything will be fine. I get out of work and head over to the watering hole. I walk in and do not see anyone I know... this is not looking good. after a extensive search I finally find two coworkers, but come to find out they do not know about this karaoke night, they just happened to be there. No one ever showed up.

I stayed and talked to the guys till they left and I followed a few seconds later. I'm now a little upset about the night, there has to be a reason nobody showed up, they probably just forgot to tell me. Something in my head keeps telling me they did it on purpose, to make me look like an idiot. Why do I do this to myself, I know I'll fret over this for a week... stupid mind.


Murf said...

It's not you. It's all the other idoits out there!!!! At least your male and it's o.k. for you to walk into someplace by yourself. Female can't do that or we look like sluts.
We Love you.

King Tom said...

It takes some (workplace acceptable euphemism for balls) to go to karaoke. I think it's everyone else- a lot of times, people just get that idea that they don't want to go, and you were the one who wanted to go.

But I get that thing too where I think either everyone hates me or is talking about me behind my back.

mcriffle said...

I don't understand why you think you were setup. Some people don't like karaoke. Some don't like to hear co-workers sing as a general rule. Also, some tv people don't like to go out after a bad night, some do. I think you are fine!

dcz said...


Take it from a guy who's pretty much disliked everywhere he goes... People like you.


Lifelong Pariah.

Lauren said...

i definitely don't think you were set up! people love your goofy personality at work...i think it was just an oversight so don't even worry :)