Late Night TV

For the past five months I have had to work the overnight weekend editing shifts. Due to some changes at JDOG-17 I have moved off this shift, but there is one thing I need to discuss. While I edit I just can't sit there. I need to have other things going on around me like my MP3 player and usually the TV. The one problem is that a lot of stations switch over to info-mercials around 1am. My favorite choice is Comedy Central, I get a nice selection of uncensored movies and comedy specials or worst case scenario I get an OK episode of MadTV.

While watching, I have noticed that the only commericals that air on Comedy Central at that time of night is Girls Gone Wild, penis growing pill and a genie trying to sell me a book that will help me pick up chicks. Gee I wonder who Comedy Central is targeting I say Wilson, single loner guys who have nothing else to do or stoners.

I understand that normal people are asleep, but I need to explain the penis growing pill ads. They never say words like penis, Johnson, junk, don or anything else that you may call your twig. Here is what they usually use

• Male part of your body


• "down there"


• that special place

Who the hell is writing these ads, twelve year old kids? You can call your manhood a lot of things and not get in trouble with the FCC. The most annoying part is the acting scene when a guy sits down on the couch with his wife/girlfriend

Woman: What do you have there?

Guy: A male enhancement pill

Woman: Male enhancement, like growing some muscle? (grabs his chest)

Guy: No, I mean "male enhancement."

Woman: Oh, you mean down there?

I serious want to punch someone every time I hear that, I just want that scene to go like this:

Woman: What do you have there?

Man: A new male enhancement pill.

Woman: To help with your small penis.

Man: What? You think it's small? You said it was a good size.

Woman: Do you think it will work?

Man What the hell? Answer the question!

Woman: I'm just saying if this works, I'll be happier

That's how it needs to be done, but now I don't need to worry about seeing this commercial for a while. Hopefully they will hire someone who can actually say penis by the time I have to see it again.